So.

Sometime ago, I managed to convince Napkin to download this texting app called “Line.” It’s gaining popularity in the US right now (I saw a commercial for it on MTV! WUT!) but it’s huge in Asia– and was EVERYWHERE when we went to Japan for our honeymoon. I pleaded with him to get it because I thought it would be funny and romantic and we wouldn’t tell anyone. (whoops!) We could use the RIDICULOUS stickers to communicate throughout our day. He laughed and said no. Then I got upset about how we were three hours apart from one another at any point and time and he folded and downloaded the app to keep me from crying. (whoops!)

Since then, there have been a lot of these:

I send a lot of over the top lovey-dovey pictures that Napkin responds to with a “Haha” or an “LOL.”

“LOL” translates, in my marriage, to: “I am sending a response because I don’t want to get in trouble but I have absolutely no idea how to respond to this.”

It’s fine. I’ll take it.

Cut to last night.

The MTV VMAs happened last night. I don’t really watch TV all that often but last night was different. If you know me at all by now, either in real life or blog life, you know that I am a little obsessed with Beyonce. But who isn’t, right? And anyone who says they’re not in love with her is simply trying to be “different.” I could go on about all the reasons that she is the best… but we all feel the same way so I’ll spare you.

Beyonce received the Video Vanguard award last night and there was ALLLLLLL this hype about her performance and what she would do and what would happen. I wasn’t about to miss it. And sure enough it was fantastic! News had leaked that she would be doing a medley of all the songs from her latest album and she didn’t disappoint. What I didn’t seen coming was a ‘special appearance’ by her daughter, Blue-Ivy, getting down to her song “***Flawless.”

My ovaries. They exploded. They are actually exploding again right now rewatching this video. (Also: GET OUT OF THE WAY RITA ORA.)

I mean.

So, naturally, after I had clutched my belly and cried my empowered female tears, I reached out to Napkin. Beyonce had spoken to me. I knew what I needed to do.

I present to you our conversation without further comment.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAA.

❤

(PS I’M NOT PREGNANT. :0 )