So, as it turns out, I’m not the most patient person in the world. 

It took Napkin and I forever to decide on a plan for this year. In fact, it took us all of last year. 

Our end game is to be normal, boring, thirty-somethings, obviously… and so we came up with a checklist to help us get to where we want to be. Napkin got a job where he works remote so we can live together. We found a temporary living space while our house is being built. We live together, for goodness sake. We watch TV. We talk about our cat a lot. We visit friends. I blogged and told you all about it.

You see where I’m going with this. Things are, for the most part, pretty normal.

Except for one thing:

Our house is being built. It’s not done yet. 

And if you really want to get into specifics– it’s still a pile of dirt… 

A good month since my last blog post about it and it’s still a pile of dirt.

Everyone says that this is normal. Or it WAS until recently. There have been a few speed bumps, in terms of paperwork and permits and whatever and that’s the reason for the hold up, according to the builder. 
Once that gets ironed out, things will fly by and we will be on our couch, in our new home, watching Game of Thrones and being perfectly predictable and boring. With snacks.

And when I hear that, I feel better. I really do! Especially the snack part! But here’s the thing:
I AM FREAKING OUT.

I’m starting to feel like it’s never going to happen and that all this hard work is for nothing. 

I feel terrible for whoever our neighbor is because her house just got done and she has to deal with me, in my shiny Honda, driving by her house every day taking pictures of a dirt lot, looking totally distressed and disappointed. 

 For your consideration (in case you think I’m joking:)

  
And a week earlier:

  
And a week before that:

  
You see where I’m going with this.

The house is all I think about. I hear about furniture sales and I have a silent, teeny tiny meltdown because I don’t know when I can even start thinking about decorating. And the YARD!! All I’ve ever wanted was a freaking garden. Our forever home has a ton a trees and that’s amazing until you realize you don’t have a single sunny spot anywhere. And you tell yourself that you will find a way to make tomatoes grow and so you buy some and you plant them in pots and you chase the sun each day with your stupid tomato pots trying to will them to grow.
And they don’t, of course.

But they don’t die. They just look miserable. 
AND THEN TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE.
You put them in the garage when it gets cold because you can’t bring yourself to throw them out (you just can’t) and so then you move away and Napkin has to water them in the garage for you and he HATES that. 
DO YOU SEE?! NAPKIN HAS TO TAKE CARE OF THE WEEPY TOMATO PLANTS BECAUSE I HAVE NO HOUSE. IT IS TERRIBLE.
EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE.
I AM REALLY IMPATIENT AND I HAVE NO YARD FOR TOMATOES AND I DONT KNOW WHEN I WILL. 

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And that’s pretty much how I feel about everything right now. Have you built a house? Do you have problems being on someone else’s schedule? Are you impatient about anything in your life right now? Any advice on what to do?

(And if you tell me to be patient or to meditate or something I WILL find you and I WILL throw a weepy tomato at you.)

More soon!